My amazing friend Robin recently ran with the Widow version of “S%*t People Say” meme. She put a call out to her widow friends to gather the (mostly) well-meaning things that people say to widows and came up with this hysterical (maybe just to widows?) video:
I heard most, if not all, of these and one point or another. Most of the time, people were really trying to be thoughtful. Or at least not insulting. Y’all, these phrases are never thoughtful and are almost always insulting.
So, here’s the secret to what to say to a widow: “I’m sorry.” If you have the need to say something else, ask, “What can I do for you?” Those may be the two most important phrases a widow/widower can hear.