Dancing, Thankfulness & Free Mammograms

October 11, 2011 By 4 Comments

My Mom is a breast cancer survivor (that’s her over there, with the ridiculously beautiful bald head). She’s been cancer-free since 2007. She fought a hard battle that left her with big scars to kick cancer’s ass. When I got the call from my Mom that she was cancer-free, I was on my way to a committee meeting for FIRST FRIDAY. FF is  a group that was founded in 1994 and whose sole purpose is to fight breast cancer through early detection and provide free screening mammograms to those in need. The women who make up the group work very hard to educate and fund raise to make it happen.

Luckily, I was connected with the group through work (my health system is the medical partner for FF, so our folks actually perform the mammograms, read the results, and connect people with medical homes). So, one of the first groups of people to hear that Mom was cancer-free was FF. The group is made up of survivors, healthcare professionals, daughters and nieces of survivors, sisters of survivors. In some way, we’ve all been touched by breast cancer or cancers that only women get. When I told the ladies of FF that Mom was doing well, there was much clapping and happiness.

Individual members also gave me perspective about my friend, Ronny’s, prognosis. How long they’d lived with metastasized breast cancer, the treatments that worked for them, how to talk with Ronny without talking about cancer. I’m so glad to have had their guidance. And the ladies of FF prayed for Ronny at the end and after she died. It’s a diverse group of women, so no matter the religious beliefs someone has, if FF sends up prayers or good thoughts, there are quite a few beings of higher power covered.

Last year a hospital in Oregon created a “Pink Glove Dance” video that went viral. This year the company that makes the pink latex gloves took the idea for the video and created a contest. My health system put together one of the videos (I’m looking at you, Julie). The rules of the contest say it’s to bring awareness to breast cancer, and while that is certainly important, I feel like most people are aware (especially in October when you can’t get away from pink). What I love about our video is that, if we win, we would donate the prize money to FIRST FRIDAY. That’s a lot of free screening mammograms, y’all.

Where can you see the video? Well, I’m glad you asked! You can watch it on the Pink Glove Dance site here.  “Liking” the video generates a vote for it, if you’re so inclined.

One of the things I love about our video is that it is filled with breast cancer survivors. The rest of us dancing around and being silly? Just fun. The survivors dancing around and being silly? Freakin’ awesome. I know how lucky I am as a daughter to have my Mom. I also know how lucky I am to get to volunteer with an organization that has a small part in keeping other people’s’ Moms around.

So what can you do?

  1. Learn more about the different types of breast cancer, signs and symptoms, and breast cancer in men by visiting the American Cancer Society.
  2. Go get a mammogram (I will be, as soon as I’m finished breastfeeding).
  3. Do a monthly self breast exam (even if it’s not recommended any longer, I don’t see the harm in know your own body).
  4. Hug your Mom.

Thanks to all of my very patients friends and family who have shared our video with their communities. I appreciate it!

Filed Under: Healthy Life, Mom & Family

The Thing About Ronny

March 21, 2011 By 33 Comments

I seem to start most of my conversations about my friend, Ronny, with that phrase. “The thing about Ronny is…” If you knew Ronny Jo Villarreal, you know how lucky you were. If you didn’t know her? I wish you had.

The thing about Ronny is that she was tough. Ronny was tough without being hard. She took on so many challenges and conquered most of them. We would all be better with a fraction of her toughness.

The thing about Ronny is that she was caring. Ronny wanted to know how you were. If she asked you, she really wanted to know, it wasn’t just a platitude with her. And no matter how busy her world was, she always wanted to know.

The thing about Ronny is that she was funny. This woman made me (and most people) laugh so hard I’d get cramps in my side. A few weeks ago I sent Ronny a little gift. In her thank-you note she said, “The plaque went perfect in my bathroom, so I hung it in front of the toilet. Now I think of you every time I have to go.” Only Ronny could work using the toilet into a thank-you note.

The thing about Ronny is that she was thoughtful. The number of times I got a something small from Ronny, at exactly the right time, is too many to count. Flowers when Mark was in the hospital, baby gifts for both of my boys, phone calls, notes, texts, emails, compliments, advice. No matter how long it had been since we had talked, I knew she was with me. I told her just the other day that I think of her and Andy most nights when I cover Tobin in the blanket they sent when he was born. It made her happy that she was in my thoughts, and she was, often.

The thing about Ronny is that she was smart. She wasn’t just book smart, although she was that, Ronny was also clever. She was good at reading people, she was good at judging situations, and she was creative.

The thing about Ronny is that she was driven. Ronny achieved. She worked her butt off in school and college. She worked hard to become a cheerleader. She worked hard to succeed professionally. She worked hard to perfect her photography. She worked hard on her relationships. She worked hard to make a home. She worked hard to have her Maddy. She worked hard to be a good mom and wife. She may have worked too hard at school, I mean, who doesn’t miss any school between kindergarten and her senior year? That’s just weird.

The thing about Ronny is that she was proud. This is one of my favorite things about Ronny. She was proud of her extended family, proud of our tiny town, proud of where we came from. Ronny was proud of her accomplishments without being boastful. Ronny was proud when her hard work resulted in success. I think that’s a rare quality in a lot of women, and it’s something I’m always striving for.

The thing about Ronny is that she was radiant. I would challenge *anyone* to look at Ronny’s smiling face and not smile back. That woman’s smile was an amazing, contagious, wonderful sight.

The thing about Ronny is that she was loyal. I don’t know that I’ve ever met someone else who had the quality of friendships that Ronny had, for the length of time she had them. She was a fierce friend. But she wasn’t blindly loyal, she told you what you needed to hear for you to be a better person, even if it hurt to hear her say it.

The thing about Ronny is that she was courageous. Like her pride, Ronny’s courage is one of my favorite things about her. Ronny was courageous in her thoughts, she didn’t believe in injustice and didn’t let others get away with it around her. Ronny was courageous in her actions, becoming a college cheerleader, getting married again, moving across the country and away from her family, trusting her instincts enough to follow her passion for photography and putting her career on hold. Making the hard choices to fight the cancer when it probably would have been easier and less painful not to. There are big, tough men who don’t have a speck of the courage that this one small woman had.

I’m lucky that I got to be Ronny’s friend, it’s just that simple. There is so much more I could say about Ronny, and so much more I’ll never know about her. I’m glad I got to share a tiny slice of her life.

Mr. and Mrs. Villarreal ~ You raised an incredible person.

Andy and Maddy~Thank you for sharing Ronny with us. You didn’t have to, but I’m so glad you did.

Ronny~ I know you’re looking down on me and telling me to suck it up, enough with the tears. I love you so much. Thanks for being my friend.

Note: If you would like to make a donation to Stand Up 2 Cancer or The Livestrong Foundation you would have one happy angel looking down on you!

Filed Under: Mom & Family

Ready, Set, Get Healthy!

September 21, 2010 By 6 Comments

This isn’t the post I intended to write about health and fitness and how it relates to me. I was going to do something frothy and upbeat, but I changed my mind. Because, maybe, being frothy and upbeat – therefore avoiding too much honest emotion – has been one of my tools for staying unhealthy and unfit. I’ve had a few kicks in the pants lately, and am determined to be healthy for the rest of my life.

In an effort to be honest with myself, in this very public place, I think I need to review.

1. I’m the most unfit and biggest I’ve ever been. In my life. Ever.
2. I want to be healthy for me and my family.
3. I want to see my grandchildren (and be able to run and play with them).
4. Hell, I want to be able to run and play with my children.
5. I need to stop treating my body like there aren’t any consequences to my actions (have I mentioned my love of ice cream?)

The encouraging thing is, I know I can get healthy because I did it while I was pregnant with Tobin. I was diagnosed early in the pregnancy (around 6 weeks) with gestational diabetes. I had had it with Nicholas, and when I felt some of the same symptoms, I asked my doctor to test me. So, I had it in control early and did it mostly with diet. While I had a little insulin, my control of my glucose levels really came through keeping track of my carb intake and portion control. While I was pregnant with Tobin, I lost around 30 pounds and felt awesome. What does all that mean? That I can’t use the excuse that I just *can’t* lose weight. Because I didn’t go on a diet, I just ate correctly, and I lost a good chunk of weight. And I did it while growing a human being. Got it.

In addition to a talk with my doctor that has helped to spur this new determination, I have had a couple of other being-taken-by-the-shoulders-and-shaken moments over the last few months. I have two people that I really love fighting cancer. People who are incredible, wonderful, kick-ass people. Also? People who were incredibly fit and healthy when they were diagnosed. People who are using every tool at their disposal to fight this disease that is trying to take them from their families. And here I am, taking my body for granted. It’s ridiculous.

Last week, on CNN, my amazing friend, Ronny, was interviewed about the breast cancer medication that she (and her doctors) feel is keeping her alive. She’s 34 and has been fighting cancer for 7 years.

I watched the clip with pride for my friend who is articulate and did a great job putting a face to the fight. I watched the clip with tears running down my face for my friend who is a mom, a wife, a daughter, a friend, a photographer, a cheerleader, and who has one of the biggest laughs in the world.

There are other kinds of survivors in my life, people who have battled disease or accidents. People who didn’t let anything stop them from living the lives they wanted to live despite their “bad luck.”

All this to say I’m getting healthy. And I’m starting today.

My incredible friend, Ronny on CNN last week:

Filed Under: Healthy Life, Mom & Family

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